…….The World Without Boundaries

Another Year Older

Written By: jipp - Sep• 20•13

So, today is my birthday anniversary. Don’t ask how old I am now. It doesn’t really matter. In a conservative environment, people would raise their eyebrows when they know that I am still not married at this age. It’s not really so much of an issue back in Sabah or at least in the town that I came from where the trend of late-marriages is quite normal.

birthday cake

I’ve got many friends, cousins and relatives who are still not married at about the same age as mine. Some got married because they got somebody pregnant. Some got married because – well – living in a small town or a village with nothing much to do, what else can they do right? Starting a family to complete the circle of life as they call it.

Here in the Peninsular of Malaysia especially among Malays, somehow people tend to give me the surprised look when I tell them that I am still not married. May be they’d think that I’m either impotent or gay. Their judging looks would linger on me for awhile. I am so used to it now so it doesn’t bother me as much it used to.

The fact is, I might have dated more girls than most of them had. I just did not live a traditional life. I could simply get married and if I’m lucky enough, have kids and splash their pictures all over facebook every now and then as if people do really care in the world about how they look.

But that was not quite the plan. There are times when I don’t see the need of getting married apart from the privilege of having sex that is religiously legal and probably investing in children so that there’d be somebody to take care of me when I am too old to take care of myself.


Source : http://sacredembrace.org/2013/01/26/love-for-the-long-haul-by-susan-vogt/old-couple-in-love/

Most people get married to fulfill the need for companionship. I see the points – crystal clear. But the question is – am I ready for the lifetime commitment? As a Catholic, I’m only allowed to get married once in life. There’s no turning point. Once I am in, I am in for the rest of my life – unless of course my spouse dies.  In today’s world, male spouses are known to die earlier than their female partners so the chances of getting married again are very slim. Heh.

I do enjoy my life now. Probably too much.  I’m surrounded by wonderful people. I’ve never run out of friends to hang out with over weekends. May be I don’t quite see the beauties in a marriage unless I get married myself. I’ll leave that to be discovered when the time has come.

May be I can simply say that I am not ready. The fact that I’ve got quite a number of friends who engage in extra-marital affairs doesn’t help much either. They seem to take pride in their ability to take somebody to bed without their wives finding out about it. Ironically, they are the ones who keep telling me that I should be married by now. Heh. What a funny world we are living in.

I was born with so many things that I wanted to fulfill in life. I’d blame it on all the reading that I did when I was a kid. As I grew older, I had found out that while not all of them were doable, most of them actually were (doable).

I’d take traveling for an example. I used to believe that was born in the wrong corner of the world, that I was supposedly born to a farming family somewhere in England – or probably Switzerland. I’d write letters to an imaginary uncle of mine, whom I called Uncle John.

I’d imagine myself walking across a hayfield, in the direction of a jingling bell from a nearby church. I’d imagine it was spring when all the flowers were blossoming. I’d stop to catch my breath, inhaling the freshness of the air and the smell of the flowers.

Of course I never got to meet this Uncle John, because he did not exist. But I did however fulfill my dream of walking across a hay-field. In Spring. 😛 And of course, I had come to terms with the fact that I was born in Sabah, on the North of Borneo Island – something that I am so proud of now that I know how lucky I actually was.

But one travel trip had started it all. It had sparked the interest in doing more and more travel trips. There’s something so fulfilling about striking something off the bucket list every time I returned home from a travel trip. It just feels so wonderful.

me at hayfield

But through my personal observation, those who travel a lot tend to get married late. You see, there’s a saying among travelers that when you travel, your priorities change. You’ll see at life from a different perspective and view.

I know a few friends who called off their weddings because they were not ready to give up traveling over a marriage. Of course you can still travel when you are married but it won’t be the same – or so they say.

So, am I ready to give up traveling? The answer is NO. I might get old traveling.

For now, I’ll just enjoy life all the things that come with it.

For now, I’ll just enjoy the new age of mine and thank God for all the blessings that he has showered me with.

How old was I again? Never mind. It doesn’t really matter 🙂

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  1. Ayeen says:

    Wonderful sharing..I believe GOD hv plan for each of us ..kan kan

  2. chegucarol says:

    Come to think of it, I do believe that if i didn’t get married 8 years ago, i would have stayed bujang myself til now cos like you, i’m fond of traveling. but the only thing that keep my feet grounded is marriage. not that im saying it is a bad thing cos my priority is different now. it’s just that, thinking of traveling now requires me to think of two person. you get what i mean, right? Again, a wish for you….HAPPY BIRTHDAY Jipp!

    • jipp says:

      Hehe, thank you very much Chegu. Of course I get what you mean. Well, of course you can still travel as a married woman, although it won’t be the same (when you’re not married). But I do get lonely when I travel alone, which I believe traveling with spouse has its advantages too. Keep on traveling Chegu. The world is too big to be traveled by unmarried ppl only 😉

  3. I guess I am thankful that I found my travel buddy, my Jill, who laugh on my silly jokes and nag me when never we got lost. Hahaha.

    You’ll found that someone in an unexpected time and in unexpected place.

    Happy Birthday Bro!

    • jipp says:

      Thanks a zillion bro. Yeah, you should be thankful to have met somebody sooner than later. If you can happily tag along with each other to different places and destinations for such a long time then chances are you are meant to be with each other. If you can stand with each other while traveling, that means you can stand with each other in marriage. Or that’s what I was told :_)

  4. evan says:

    Was googling about Tutuban Mall and this is the blog that comes up. LOL. I guess we are in the same boat but the difference with me would be “you got an expiry date you know”. Oh well after a few years you get used to the comments and just ignore, smile and walk away. Happy birthday to you and continue with your travels. There is still so much to see and do kan 🙂

    • jipp says:

      Thanks Evan. Wahh, Tutuban Mall? One of my favorite places in Manila. Yeah, I’m so used to all the Qs now that they all sound monotone to me. LOL

  5. Yeinjee says:

    I always have a feeling that I’ll meet my other half during my travels lol. Happy belated birthday, and happy travelling.

  6. nadiah najib says:

    a big fan of your blog and loves to read about your trip… wonderful post jipp… 🙂 .. couldn’t agree more…. . ..

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